Ode to a Spell Chequer
I have a spelling chequer
It came with my PC
It plainly marks for my revue
miss takes I cannot see
I've run this poem threw it
I'm shore your pleased two no
its letter perfect in its weigh
my chequer tolled me sew.
Humour based on lack of pragmatic competence (some sentences found in labels and packages):
On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner!
No purchase necessary.
Details inside.
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:You could be a winner!
No purchase necessary.
Details inside.
Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.
On some Swanson frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
Humour based on change of register and literary knowledge:
A woman was out shopping one day with her son. The boy spotted a man who was bowlegged.
The boy pulled on Mom's hand and said, "Momma, look at the bowlegged man!"
Mom was mortified and told her son that it was not polite to point to a person and make that sort of comment.
For punishment, the boy had to read a play by Shakespeare. He couldn't go shopping again until he finished reading the play. Finally, he finished and his mom took him once again to the mall.The boy pulled on Mom's hand and said, "Momma, look at the bowlegged man!"
Mom was mortified and told her son that it was not polite to point to a person and make that sort of comment.
Again he spied a bowlegged man, but remembered what happened the last time. So he pulled on his mother's hand and said, "Lo, what manner of men are these, who wear their balls in parentheses?"
Ha, ha!
ReplyDeleteCruel! (With the Bard, I mean).
ReplyDelete